I received this note about my blog entry last week:
August 22, 2016 at 10:27 am
Very helpful. The negative thoughts can occur instantaneously and even outside of our awareness. Important to slow down and notice even if in process of a behavior that is the outcome of the negative thought.
As a follow up to your post it would be helpful if you would write a blog about dealing with irrational self- beliefs and expectations ie. “I need to be perfect” “I need to be liked by everyone”?
Dear Reader, Thanks for taking this further. Underlying the core issue of low self-esteem is irrational thinking. Having personally experienced cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT), I understand first-hand how we develop false concepts based upon our individual learning experiences, our parents’ beliefs, and societal expectations. Challenge, fear, confusion, worry, criticism, grandiosity, all-or-nothing thinking, magical or delusional thinking, paranoia and leaps-in-logic bombard us to severely affect our individual belief system.
The first half of the battle comes in recognizing these irrational thinking styles and understanding how they developed. It’s not easy to identify and it is more than likely that you will need help from someone on the outside to recognize your personal irrationality. But it’s worth the effort, because once you label and dissect an irrational thought, you begin to take away some of its power.
One of the fundamental tools in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) for the process of letting these false ideas go is a simple cognitive restructuring form called The Thought Record. It takes each irrational self-belief, reveals its source, its underlying principle, and its link to a negative emotion giving you an opening into new more positive possibilities. Try it. Again, from personal experience, I can assure you it works!