It’s Time for Beginner’s Mind

In the beginner’s mind there are many possibilities, but in the expert’s there are few.

Roshi Shunryu Suzuki

If you haven’t figured it out from previous entries, I am no longer using my beautiful armoire as my container. My container has become something much bigger and bolder as I explore how I can apply The Container Project to everything around me.

Along with the help of the Middle Way, I am going to apply the Zen practice of Beginner’s mind as I view my actions without preconception or judgment. The most important idea here is to take every decision as part of the learning experience, to accept the change and not feel that I failed in any way by going beyond The Container.

The new Container Project Rules:
The nature of container rules will continue to change.
I will slowly incorporate container ideas into my life.
I will fully engage in enquiry, focusing on questions rather than answers.
I will let go of knowing the outcome living one moment at a time.
I have then entire universe as my teacher.
I will immerse myself in my actions.
I must accept change with good nature and without self-criticism.
I will take one step at a time and not look behind or beyond.
I will celebrate what ever happens as part of the learning process.
There is no failure. I will accept my mistakes as part of the experience.
I will let go of being an expert to be more engaged in my innate wisdom and experience.
I will search for the extra-ordinary in the ordinary.
I will create this project in the same spirit that I create my life.

The Middle Way

Great is the matter of birth and death
Life slips quickly by
Time waits for no one
Wake up Wake up
Don’t waste a moment!

Rochester Zen Center

My Container Project is becoming an internal thoughtful examination of my daily life, which brings me to my Zen training of The Middle Way.

The Middle Way will be my guide to a life between the extremes of self-denial and self-indulgence. The Middle Way eliminates my assumptions and examines my experience with clear vision and open mind.

As I clarify my intentions and distinguish my needs, I will find the path of right speech and right action that is the wisdom within the core of my being.

The Plethora of Things to Cast Off

Tashlich is a Jewish custom in which we symbolically cast away our sins into a moving body of water. It is usually performed the first day of Rosh Hashanah in preparation for Yom Kippur. Tashlich is based on a verse “And you will cast all your sins into the depths of the sea.” from Micha, 7:19.

Looking for an alternative to the traditional prayer I came across this poem At the Water’s Edge: A Reading for Tashlikh by Elizabeth Tragash and this ceremony by Susie Kessler and Janice Rous. Instead of concentrating on the traditional idea of sins, these women reframe tashlich to encourage us to release anything we are holding on to that is obsolete and no longer serve us in the same way that trees release their foliage in this change of season.

Which brings me to a powerful video, Fall, by Shirin Neshat, an artist that marks the changing seasons by addressing the famine in Somalia.

For this tashlich let’s stretch ourselves to go beyond our personal sins and release any undercurrent of powerlessness so that we may sail into an authentic transformation for this new year.

And If Not Now, When?

I truly believe that a two-state solution is the only way to ensure a more stable Middle East and to grant Israel the security and well-being it desires.
Ehud Olmert

Today, President Mahmoud Abbas of the Palestinian Authority formally asked the Security Council to grant full United Nations membership to Palestine as a path toward its statehood. The outcome of the activities at the United Nations will have no real influence on the lives of ordinary Palestinians and Israelis. True peace in the Middle East can only come about through direct negotiations with Israel for a two-state solution.

If you need an overview of the whole Israel-Palestine conflict take some time to read Israeli-Palestinian Conflict 101 or the more detailed Institute for Middle East Understanding website.

Also, take a look at the possible middle ground land-swap scenarios from the Geneva Initiative in these three maps that reconcile the Palestinian demand for a return to the pre-1967 lines with Israel’s desire to include as many of the West Bank’s 300,000 settlers in Israel proper as possible.

Enough is enough. It is time for justice, peace, and happiness for all of the peoples of the region. Leaders, please heed Ehud Olmert’s editorial in today’s New York Times: Peace Now, or Never.

Self Compassion Is An Art Unto Itself

If you’re going to be thinking, you may as well think big.

Donald Trump

I hate to admit this but I finally figured out the most important thing I am missing in my life is more compassion for myself. I’m already off on the wrong foot by not wanting to admit the deficit. If I had more compassion for myself I would know it is a necessity not a choice. This Container Project is a perfect example. I have fallen short of my goals leaving me feeling frustrated and miserable.

We are human. We will encounter limits, frustrations, and loss. To open our hearts and accept this is part of our human condition is to have compassion. Self-compassion is neither self-esteem nor self-indulgence. Self-esteem is our sense of self-worth and perceived value based on our success or failure. Self-indulgence is over-the-top decadence regardless of need.

Self-compassion comes from within and is always available. It offers greater clarity on life circumstances because inadequacy, suffering and failings are accepted with kindness and support. When kindness is the reality, emotional equanimity is experienced.

With self-compassion, I understand things I labeled indulgences like good food, a long nap, or a costly exercise class are imperative to restoring and refreshing my body. I allow myself to be an imperfect and vulnerable interbeing. I take a balanced non-judgmental approach to my negative emotions so my feelings are neither exaggerated nor suppressed. Knowing that I am worthy of kindness, I forgive, accept, celebrate and love me.

The Container project lesson: The Container is not about things. It is not about accomplishment. It is not about things outside of our control. It is about a process, awareness and overflowing compassion. I am my Container.

Success in Failure

My newest struggle with My Container started this week with the change in weather. Suddenly, my perfect wardrobe was no longer perfect. That brought out the internal struggle of my commitment to the project. Should I adhere absolutely to the rules? Should I change out what is no longer working? Would it be right to simply give up the project as unworkable?

I was looking for the answers to these questions when I ran into this Sunday’s New York Times Magazine Education Issue with the lead article What if the Secret to Success Is Failure? This is the story of how two New York City schools are forging new frontiers in character education by incorporating information from Peterson and Seligman’s Character Strengths and Virtues.

With the authors’ help, the principals of the schools settled on a list of six strengths that were especially likely to predict life satisfaction and high achievement: zest, grit, self-control, social intelligence, gratitude, optimism and curiosity and worked to incorporate them into every teaching strata of their schools. Interesting article on great work in education.

In the book for psychology professionals, Peterson and Seligman pioneer a method to classify and evaluate twenty-four indispensable character strengths and virtues that lead to a higher quality of life. It is an impressive list to guide me to the next right place in my project.

Here are all twenty-four:
Zest: approaching life with excitement and energy; feeling alive and activated.
Grit: completing something despite obstacles with persistence and resilience.
Self-control: regulating what one feels and does; being self-disciplined.
Social intelligence: being aware of motives and feelings of other people and oneself.
Gratitude: being aware of and thankful for the good things that happen.
Love: valuing close relationships with others; being close to people.
Hope: expecting the best in the future and working to achieve it.
Humor: liking to laugh and tease; bringing smiles to other people; seeing a light side.
Creativity: coming up with new and productive ways to think about and do things.
Curiosity: interest in experience for its own sake; finding things fascinating.
Open-mindedness: examining things from all sides and not jumping to conclusions.
Love of learning: mastering new skills and topics on one’s own or in school.
Wisdom: being able to provide good advice to others.
Bravery: not running from threat, challenge, or pain; speaking up for what’s right.
Integrity: speaking the truth and presenting oneself sincerely and genuinely.
Kindness: doing good deeds for others; helping them; taking care of them.
Citizenship: working well as a member of a group or team; being loyal to the group.
Fairness: treating all people the same; giving everyone a fair chance.
Leadership: encouraging a group of which one is a valued member to accomplish.
Forgiveness: forgiving those who’ve done wrong; accepting people’s shortcomings.
Modesty: letting one’s victories speak for themselves; not seeking the spotlights.
Prudence/Discretion: being careful about one’s choices; not taking undue risks.
Appreciation of Beauty: noticing and appreciating all kinds of beauty and excellence.
Spirituality: having beliefs about the higher purpose and meaning of the universe.

Keeping It Personal

It is almost impossible to believe it has been ten years since 9/11. Like every one, I clearly remember my circumstances, working at a project at the Heinz History Center when we were told of the incident and sent home. I drove home through town and shuttered in fear passing our Federal Building wondering if it would be next.

There are all kinds of extensive coverage and exceptional events to help us make sense of an event of this magnitude. The New York Times did a magnificent piece: The Reckoning:America And The World A Decade After 9/11 and there will be the Dedication and Commemoration of the Shanksville Memorial for Flight 93 only two hours from us.

There is this monumental book: Tower Stories: An Oral History of 9/11 that relates the many simple acts heroism and The Person to Person History Tribute WTC Visitor Center created and run by the family members who lost loved ones.

I loved the novel by Jonathan Safran Foer: Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, from the point of view of a nine-year-old attempting to understand the tragedy that included his father.


Today NPR did a story on Father Mychal Judge the chaplain for the New York City Fire Department. He was the first victim of the incident whose death saved the lives of five men who carried him out of the Towers.

How do we make sense out of all of this? It seems to me the best way is to keep the experience at the most personal level possible and learn as much as we can about the bravery, the love, the sense of purpose, and the understanding. Then in the words of AA, let go and let God trusting that everything happens for a reason.

Mindful Insight

One of the gifts of My Container Project is how it has heightened my mindfulness. I have stepped out of my regular habitual motions and am actively attentive to my limited palette of Container choices. It is fascinating to observe my thoughts and feelings at each particular juncture. For example, yesterday morning I have a busy day with morning meditation, a spiritual group meeting, food shopping, commission work, writing a blog, and teaching a class. What will I wear?

The-before-container-me has a huge walk-in closet with way-too-many choices. My mind wanders through the collection and discards each possibility as not quite right for a host of reasons like the fit, or the color, or the sleeves. It takes me forever-and-a-day to finally be dressed and as a result of the process I don’t feel too good about my selection process, my choices, or myself.

The uniform from my container is perfect- Capri knit pants with pockets; a long knit flowing blouse with a second layer fluid knit no-button cardigan and sandals. It takes me seconds to get dressed; I am comfortable and feel put together and have no clothing issues for the entire day.

There is a meditation technique called vipassana or insight that teaches a state of uninterrupted mindfulness. It begins with a moment of simple, soft-focused awareness where the thing is simply observed without a story. Mindfulness observes the physical, mental, and emotional experience of what is present in the here and now with no feeling.

I am watching myself in process with My Container. I have totally limited my choices to things I know I like, make me comfortable and will work in my situation. I am grateful for My Container that keeps me mindfully to task, no longer stuck in my habitual wanderings and diversions, clear and ready to be with my day.

Is it possible My Container will have a profound impact on my universe? I will continue nonjudgmental observation of my process with no pride, no shame, and nothing personal to win or lose. It is what it is and my experience will be what it will be.

What Ever You Do, Smile

“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.”

Thich Nhat Hanh

Thich Nhat Hanh

This past July when President Obama turned fifty, there was a great article in the New York Times about his aging face. The bottom line is that no different than any of us, Obama is getting older and grayer.

Time, heredity, sunlight, illness, mood, good and bad fortune leave their mark on our faces. Here is a timeline for an aging face and some suggestions to help cope.

There is only so much you can do about wrinkles, crow’s feet and hanging jowls, but there is one facial expression within your control that can make a difference. It is your smile.

Our smile is our power and the source of our joy. Smiling works proactively to put others at ease. It’s the one thing that radiates out into our universal language of love. Smiles have no demarcations in race, gender, class and, best of all, age. When all else fails, as it will, smile to your past, present and future.

A Time To Forgive

Here we are in the month of Elul leading up to the High Holy Days of Rosh Hashanah and Yom Kippur. Elul is a sanctum for introspection and self-assessment as we conduct a full Cheshbon Ha Nefesh, an accounting of the soul. During Elul we separate from our material entanglements to audit our spiritual accounts and restore our desire for true teshuvah, repentance.

In the Hebrew Bible, Moses ascended for the second time to the top of Mount Sinai on the first of Elul to plead for forgiveness for the Israelites because of their worship of the Golden Calf. He remained there for 40 days and created the second set of tablets of the Ten Commandments.

Allocate time during this month for personal reflection, meditation and prayer. Listen to the sounding of the shofar as a call to repentance. Read the Psalms, particularly Psalm 27. Visit the burial place of your loved ones. As the month draws to an end, add Selichot prayers that include the 13 Attributes of Mercy, the very words of the Israelites used to beg for divine compassion.

Twenty-Seven A Song of Morning
By Debbie Perlman
Let me slide into the morning, Dawn Bringer,
With a smooth joining.
In the last glimpse of dreams,
Open my heart to a day
Poised to fill with goodness.

Let me move into today, Time Maker,
With a firm footing.
With Your name upon my mouth,
I translate my praises into action,
Repairing my section of the world.

You recall to me my story;
You let me describe its sequel.
At day’s beginning, You comfort me,
Offering a Hand filled with courage
To sustain my work.

Let me glimpse tomorrow, Eternal Planner,
With eager memories.
Breathing deeply to set my heart
To the rhythm of creation,
I continue Your work.

You bring me to my beginnings,
To the beginnings of Your People,
Connecting my days to all other days,
Tying my work in the work of Your hand.